Bully

Recently I learned that my best friend from childhood lost both her parents within several years of each other. I didn’t know that her mother had died a year ago nor had I learned until now that her father had also died a few years prior. I had not been in contact with my friend since I was last in my hometown over 20 years ago. I knew her parents well and she and I had been close since we were in nursery school, though our friendship had ceased somewhere in the fourth grade.

At first we exchanged several pleasant emails and shared our memories and sorrows. But then I asked her to friend me on Facebook and she did but soon sent a follow-up email telling me she was un-friending me because I was a witch and she said that kind of thing freaked her out.

I did not reply to her nor would I ever again. Narrow-minded people with closed hearts have no place in my life. I do not suffer fools and people with prejudices and ignorance.

I was hurt though because I contacted her to offer condolences and I don’t think that you should take such a stand with someone who comes to you to share kindness. Why did she need to say such a thing to me? What harm in the world would being my friend on Facebook mean? Would her other friends have said something (it was not my Morrigane account but my private real name account and I do not have any links to any witchcraft things though I make no secret of my practices, including Buddhism. Would she have un-friended me for that too?)

Many years ago I wondered why she had turned on me as a friend. She decided I was not cool enough and popular enough and then went on to be one of the popular girls in our school and was very cruel to me. I hoped after all these years that she had changed but instead I discovered that the wicked and mean little girl she had been is the compassionless woman she has become, so self-absorbed that she actually thought anyone would care that she was friends with a Buddhist Witch on Facebook.

She purports to be an artist, taking photos,almost all self-portraits in a fairy-esque fantasy themed collection of indulgent narcissistic images. She plans to sell these though I don’t know who would ever purchase photos of a middle-aged woman in such portraits. She is no real artist since artists do not tend to limit their hearts and minds and do so in such an unfeeling way.

I found myself wondering if after all these years that she somehow set me up thinking that she was this evolved person, so she could reel me in and then stab me delightfully by putting me down as she had done when we were children. I was not one of the popular kids and she decided that instead of being friends with me, she would be cruel to me and make fun of me every day at school. She was a bully then and sadly is a bully today.

I have learned a valuable lesson and I will continue to show compassion even to those who have not shown me the same. But I won’t engage them in dialogue and go on the assumption that once a creep, always a creep.